Texting

Shakespheare

Here’s a challenge for you. Read these pieces of text-speak and see if you can place them. I think Shakespeare would smile if he could see them.  ‘2 b, r nt 2 b dat iz d Q wthr ts noblr n d mnd 2 sufr d slngs & arowz of outrAjs fortn r 2 tAk armz agnst a C f trblz, & by oposn nd em?’ ‘2mrw & 2mrw & 2mrw crEpz n dis pety plAs frm dA 2 dA 2 d lst silabl of rcrdd tIm & al our ystdAz hv lItd f%lz d way 2 dsty def…tis a tAl tld by an ejit, ful of snd & fury sgnfyn nutin.’ ‘bt, sft! wot lIt thru yndr wndo brAkz? Ts d Est, & Juliet iz d sn. ArIs, fair sn, & kil d envios m%n, hu iz alredi sk & pAl w grEf, dat thou hr mAd art fr mo fair thn she.’ ‘& gntlmn n Englnd, nw a-bed shl fnk thmslvs acrsd dey wr not hr, & hld thr mnh%dz chEp whl NE spk dat fort w us on St Crspns dA’ I’ll give you a clue. They come from Henry V, Hamlet, Macbeth and Romeo and Juliet. (not in that order, though)

Here are excerpts from some of Shakespeare's most famous soliloquies translated into text speak. I did not write them since I am officially text illiterate. They are from an article in which politicians are condemning the use of text-speak in exams. See if you can figure them out –answers below.

1) "2 b, r nt 2 b dat iz d Q wthr ts noblr n d mnd 2 sufr d slngs & arowz of outrAjs fortn r 2 tAk armz agnst a C f trblz, & by oposn nd em?"

2) "bt, sft! wot lIt thru yndr wndo brAkz? Ts d Est, & Juliet iz d sn. ArIs, fair sn, & kil d envios m%n, hu iz alredi sk & pAl w grEf, dat thou hr mAd art fr mo fair thn she."

3) "& gntlmn n Englnd, nw a-bed shl fnk thmslvs acrsd dey wr not hr, & hld thr mnh%dz chEp whl NE spk dat fort w us on St Crspns dA."

4) "2mrw & 2mrw & 2mrw crEpz n dis pety plAs frm dA 2 dA 2 d lst silabl of rcrdd tIm & al our ystdAz hv lItd f%lz d way 2 dsty def...tis a tAl tld by an ejit, ful of snd & fury sgnfyn nutin."

1) "To be, or not to be: that is the question: / Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer / The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, / Or to take arms against a sea of troubles / And by opposing end them?" (Hamlet, Act Three, Scene One)

2) "But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks? / It is the east, and Juliet is the sun. / Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon, / Who is already sick and pale with grief, / That thou her maid art far more fair than she." (Romeo and Juliet, Act Two, Scene Two)

3) "And gentlemen in England now abed / Shall think themselves accursed they were not here / And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks / That fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day." (Henry V, Act Four, Scene Three)

4) "To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow / Creeps in this petty place from day to day / To the last syllable of recorded time / And all our yesterdays have lighted fools / The way to dusty death. ...it is a tale / Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury / Signifying nothing." (Macbeth, Act Five, Scene Five)